10 things funnier than Dick Wolfsie: improv edition

#10: tofu 

#9: angioplasty 

#8: mung beans 

#7: caulking guns 

#6 silly putty 

#5: pyjamas with feet 

#4: crack babies 

#3; festering wounds 

#2: 'tool' 

#1: the jersey shore

10 things funnier than dick wolfsie: Awkward

#10 "Hi, Dick."

#9 "Really, some of my best friends are black."

#8 "You have been asked to appear on Maury Povitch?"

#7 "Ummm, yeah, but your garbage is public property."

#6 "Why is the repair man wearing my shoes?"

#5 "You're not my real Dad!"

#4 "Yeah, let's see other people."

#3 "I'm confused, so you were or were not a stripper?"

#2 "You're last husband was a Nazi?!?"

#1 "Meth?"

Medicolegal investigation of death edition

#10: hypothermia
#9: bleed out
#8: immolation, pugilist position
#7: floater
#6: sinker
#5: de-gloving
#4: heatwave
#3: eaten by own dog
#2: auto erotic asphyxiation
#1: crushed in the gears of a carousel
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

10 Things Funnier than Dick Wolfsie: Theatrical Version

#10: Spring Time for Hitler
#9: Hamlet
#8: Death of a Salesman Biff
#7: Wagner
#6: Glengarry Glenross
#5: Jean Genet
#4: No Exit ;)
#3: Waiting for Godot
#2: House Party 4
#1: The Crucible

10TFTDW: Flashback Edition via Erin

1: Pink Lady & Jeff
2. The plaid bellbottoms I wore in my 2nd grade class picture
3. Tony Kiritsis
4. Burger Chef & Jeff
5. Ungroomed naughty bits
6. Quaaludes
7. Are You There God, It's Me, Margaret
8. Big-handled Goody combs (worn in the back pocket, natch)
9. Fondue
10. Gallagher. But just barely

10 Things Funnier than Dick Wolfsie: Crap I found around my house edition

#10 Vapo Rub

#9 Spoon

#8 Mug

#7 Sippy Cup

#6 Stump

#5 Bad Banana

#4 Garbage

#3 Big Toe

#2 Minotaur

#1 Brown Carpet

10 Things Funnier than Dick Wolfsie via Erin!!!

1. Sucking chest wounds
2. Shag carpeting
3. Pancakes!
4. Post-mortem lividity (that one's for you, Mr. Mathews)
5. Huffing silver spray paint
6. the Zune
7. Gene Simmons' hair
8. Incontinence
9. My recent budget proposal (seriously, that one was fucking hilarious)
10. The sweet release of death

Cultus Edition

10 things funnier than Dick Wolfsie: 
Cultus Edition

#10: David Koresh
#9: Jim Jones
#8: Jimmy Swaggart
#7: The Manson Family
#6: Heaven's Gate
#5: Aztecs
#4: the Inquisition
#3: Mormons
#2: Pictures of Mohammed 
#1: Jesus F@$#ing Christ! 

10 More Things that are Funnier than Dick Wolfsie

#10 Colonoscopy 

#9 Reign of Terror 

#8 Irish Potato Famine 

#7 Blues Clues 

#6 Anthrax 

#5 Yo' Mama 

#4 Due Process 

#3 The Acid Rain is Killing You... Now 

#2 Parsnips 

#1 'feltch'

via Christine Williams

1. Txt msg splng&pnctshn
2. bungee jumping
3. Anton LaVey
4. The Brady Bunch
5. sweet & sour chicken
6. Billy Mays
7. Fashion Week
8. mug cozies
9. Mormons
10. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

via John Ross

1: death
2: the letter q
3: his ass
4: George Will
5: rope
6: anything that comes in brown
7: pennies
8: Chernobyl
9: me
10: Jay Leno

Will's list

#1 the economy, stupid
#2 Gulag
#3 Maury Povitch
#4 it's not you, it's me
#5 hairlip
#6 sodomy laws
#7 the Rape of Nan king
#8 galoshes
#9 intravenous drug use
#10 full cavity search